


TAZ Laputa

by TrashyNerdork



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Admittedly many ships are also just cameos, Alternate Universe, Castle in the Sky AU, I'm trying to fit a lot into what started as a short fic, admittedly a lot of these characters are just cameos
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-12
Updated: 2018-05-15
Packaged: 2019-03-04 01:56:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 9,659
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13354074
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TrashyNerdork/pseuds/TrashyNerdork
Summary: TAZ Castle in the sky auThe chapters are probs gonna be super short just letting ya know{Discontinued}





	1. 1

Barry sits stiff, eyes fixated on the man across from him. The stare-down is broken when a commotion broke out outside.

“Sir, pirates have overtaken the ship.” One of the suited men states upon entering the room.

“Get it under control, I’ll contact Sazed to get us out of here.” John orders. The man leaves the room once more and John turns to a corner, pulling out his stone of farspeach and muttering more orders into it. Barry kreeps out of his seat and wraps his fingers around the cool neck of a hefty alcohol bottle and sneaks up behind John, smashing the bottle across his head. John immediately falls unconscious on the ground. With no hesitation Barry reaches into John’s breast pocket and pulls out a thin leather string with a glittering blue stone. Barry ties it around his neck with a content smile, happy to have it back in his possession.

The moment of peace is broken when the door is being bannged on -the pirates no doubt-. He hastily looks around and locks onto the window. He stumbles over to it and forces it open, climbing out and clinging to the wall of the ship and shuffling towards the next window, fighting against the bitter wind.

The door frame splinters and two figures burst into the room, gunshots and someone’s maniacal laughter clear in the background.

“Holy shit! Did he jump out the window!?” One of the voices exclaims. A burly human man with strong sideburns wearing a fiery mask pokes his head out the window and looks both ways before having to do a double-take when he sees Barry. “Oh my gods Merle, he DID!”

“Hang on a sec Magnus!” the other man, Merle, shouts back. Moments later and a couple loud sounds from the next room and a dwarven man with a florally decorated grey beard wearing the same fiery mask pops out of the window the Barry was headed towards. “Wow, yeah. That looks dangerous, and that's coming from a pirate! Listen, we-uh we won't hurt you if you just come back inside…”

Magnus and Merle both reach out their hands to grab him and pull him back to 'safety’.

“WHAT ARE YOU CHUCKLEFUCKS DOING IN THERE!?” An authoritative voice barks from further inside.

“The guy jumped out the window! We're trying to get him back inside!” Magnus shouts back.

“Shit man, he better not fall, I want that crystal!”

And with that Barry takes a deep breath before letting go and falling into the night followed by a chorus of screams.

 


	2. 2

Lup runs into the shop and straight to the counter, waving to a few familiar faces as she passes them.

“Heya Ren! The usual for boss-man please!” She says, pushing Redmond’s thermos onto the counter.

Ren picks it up and begins pouring thick, steaming stew with veggies and meat into it, “Working late again?” She asks.

“Yeah, gotta pay the bills somehow.” Lup smirks.

“Could always become a pirate~” Ren teases. She pushes the now filled thermos to her.

“Like that goober? Yeah right! Taako is a mess and you know it!” Lup jokes, taking the thermos and handing Ren money for the food, “Have a good night!” Lup calls, running out of the shop and back towards the mines.

“You too!” Ren calls back as Lup leaves.

 

“What the-” she whispers to herself, peering up at the bright blue light floating down towards the centre of the mine.

She dashes across the rest of the field and quickly drops Redmond’s thermos on a small table before stepping gracefully across the platform of machinery overhanging the giant hole in the earth that is the mine. The figure lines up perfectly with the end of the platform and Lup holds out her arms to catch them.

Up close now Lup can see the figure clearly, a chubby human man with light brown hair and a little stubble, wearing thick-framed rectangular glasses, blue jeans, and a bright, crimson robe. There’s also a glowing blue crystal on a thin leather loop tied around his neck and floating just above his chest.

He bounces up a little when he bumps Lup’s arms and she raises them up a little bit to properly grab hold of him. The crystal’s light slowly fades out and it falls onto his chest like any ordinary stone. Once the light is gone gravity goes back to normal and Lup stumbles a little at the sudden weight, she’s probably taller than him but this guy is at least three times her size overall, it’s a good thing she regularly has to lift heavy equipment or they’d be goners. Lup walks back to a wider, sturdier part of the platform and sets him down, debating about possibly waking him up.

“Lup is that you!? I need you down here asap!” Redmond calls over the howl of malfunctioning machinery.

“I’m on it!” Lup replies, sparing one last glance at the handsome stranger before hopping down using several different platforms to make her way down to fix the equipment.


	3. 3

Barry’s eyes slowly start to flutter open and he sits up with a start, whipping his head around to analyze his surroundings. He sits on a small but comfortable bed in a small but cozy house made of wood and brick. The walls are covered in paintings of airplanes and two twins. The scent of food wafts through the air form another room along with a beautiful voice humming the tune of a lovely upbeat song. Barry pulls to his feet, wrapping one hand around his crystal for comfort, and walks into the other room.

Standing at a stove, swaying her hips as she cooks, is a stunning elven woman with blonde hair to her waist tied into a loose ponytail wearing blue jeans and a white button-up shirt with the sleeves pushed up above her elbows as well as an series of small rings and studs glittering on her long ears.

Her ears perk up as he turns the corner and she turns to him with a smile, “Hey there space-man, how ya feeling?”

Barry tenses up a little, “Uh- fine I guess, um- who are you and where am I and- why did you call me space-man???”

She chuckled, “My name's Lup, you're in my house, and you're space-man because you floated down from the sky last night like some kinda alien. Could call ya by your name if I knew what it was.” She smiled.

“Uh- Barry my name is Barry Bluejeans.”

She slaps a hand over her mouth to hold back the fit of giggles that wracks her shoulders. Barry’s ears flush hot with embarrassment and he averts his gaze to the ground.

“Oh my god that is the best name ever!” Lup exclaims between laughs, “And my brother's name is TAAKO!” She snorts.

Barry chuckles a little and feels the heat move from his ears to his cheeks.

As soon as Lup recovers her eyes widen for a second, “Shit!” She exclaims, shoving the pan off the burner, “Sorry, I got a little distracted.” She adds a few more things to the pan before moving the eggs on to slices of toast and bacon to the side of the pan. “I figured I'd make us breakfast while you were still passed out.” She motions to a wooden table with two chairs and sets the plates down.

Barry feels his stomach grumble from him skipping multiple meals and he sits down at the table. As soon as Lup starts eating he takes it as a que that he doesn't need to wait and picks up the toast with the egg on it and takes a bite. His eyes widen a little, it might be the starvation talking but this simple meal feels like the best food he’s ever had.


	4. 4

A low rumble roars in from outside and Lup pushes her face to the window, “Wow would you look at that, a real automobile, don't see many of those around here.”

Barry looks out the window for a short moment before backing away.

Lup turns to look at him with a quizzical expression, “What's up?”

“Those are pirates, same ones that made me jump off the airship.” He says with a grimace.

“Wh- does that mean they're after you? What am I saying, I literally saw you float down from the sky with a magic glowing necklace, of course they're after you!” Lup hits her forehead with the heel of her palm.

Barry nods, nervously eying the approaching pirate.

“Well let's get you a disguise and get out of here!” Lup pulls him into a back room, collecting a few things along the way.

 

A dark skinned man with tied up dreadlocks and a fitted dark suit approaches the door as Lup runs out, Barry ducking behind her.

“Woah, woah, woah wait! I just need to ask you something real quick?” The man asks in a terrible cockney accent.

“Whatcha need big guy?” Lup smiles up at him. She's wearing a hat now and has her sleeves down. Behind her, Barry has removed his red robe and traded it for a medium length denim cloak and a hat matching Lup’s pulled over his eyes.

“I'm looking for a guy-”

“You're gonna have to be a little more specific, we got like a hundred dudes in this town.” She grins.

The man lets out a frustrated huff, “Ya know, you really remind me of-” she doesn't even give him the chance to finish his thought as she grabs Barry's hand and sprints towards town.

“Hey Kravitz!” An Orc with her hair tied in a loose bun calls up from a lower level of the cottage.

“What is it Killian?” 

She holds up a bright red robe, “He’s in disguise!”

“Oh shoot, tell Taako!” he says, turning to where Lup and Barry just ran off to.

“You tell him, he's your fiance!” she chuckles, running after him.


	5. 5

“Now c’mon, we don't want trouble, we just wanna know if you've seen him.” Magnus says, squaring up against Redmond’s squared-up chest.

“I haven't a clue who your talking about, now leave.” Redmond states firmly.

Lup comes dashing down the road, dragging Barry close behind her. “Hey! Redmond!” Lup shouts, waving her free hand.

“His figure is a lot like that chubby guy there.” Merle points to them.

An unlucky stumble and right as Merle points at them, Barry trips and nearly pulls Lup to the ground with him as his hat comes falling off.

“It is him!” A blue dragonborn shouts, jumping up from behind Magnus.

Lup swiftly lifts Barry up and plops him on his feet, turning 180 degrees to perfectly face Killian rushing towards them.

Closed off on both sides, Lup swings Barry under the trio’s legs towards Redmond and Luca. Carey and Magnus jump over him and Merle stumbles to the side. Lup then takes the opening and slips between Magnus and Merle to once again pull Barry, who is a little dizzy and dazed from being tossed around so much, back on his feet and behind her once more. She pushes up her sleeves and squares her chest towards the pirates. Luca opens the house’s door again and slips in, dragging Lup and Barry with him.

“Wha- c’mon I can take em!” Lup protests.

“No. We can take them, you and your friend need to get out of here.” Luca says, grabbing a cast iron skillet and gesturing to the back door.

“Ooooh,” Lup whispers softly, “gottcha. See ya later Luca!” she calls quietly, Barry still being dragged behind her.

 

Luca slides back outside and stands against the door, slightly behind Redmond.

“You think you're so tough, well watch this!” Carey shouts, gesturing to her large human friend, “Show em’ Maggie!”

“Ladies, gentlemen, and gentlethem keep your eyes on the buttons,” Merle commentates as Magnus flexes his muscles with a grin, “and a one and a two and-” his shirt explodes from the size and strength and Magnus chuckles triumphantly. Merle and Carry proceed to lose their shit screaming their heads off.

“Julia’s gonna kick your ass for that later I hope you know.” Killian states, looking him up and down. Magnus’s expression falls as he visibly winces.

Redmond flexes his muscles as well and explodes his shirt same as his opponent, smirking triumphantly.

“Brother, I do wish you would stop doing that.” Luca sighs. Redmond glances at him apologetically and Magnus takes the opportunity to punch him in the gut. Redmond smiles, placing a hand on the taller man’s shoulder before returning the gut punch full force. The two of them begin to full on brawl.

Carey, Killian, and Merle loudly cheer on from the sides until someone punches Merle and soon the whole town is in this tussle.


	6. 6

Kravitz shouts as he catches sight of the ridiculous denim cloak and Taako roughly maneuvers the car to a stop, pulling out a pair of binoculars as he does so.

“That's him alright, but who's that with him?”

“I don't know, she kinda reminded me of you though.”

“Well it's not like that matters, they're following the train tracks so it'll be easy to find them again, now let's go get the rest of the chucklefucks.” 

The engine roars to life again and the car swerves dangerously, Taako grinning and whooping as he slams the accelerator and Kravitz standing behind him, clutching the seat with a death grip but cheering all the same.

 

Lup and Barry jog along the train tracks, attempting to lose the pirates.

“Are you sure your friends will be ok back there?” Barry pants, struggling to maintain pace with Lup.

“Ha! The people here are miners, trust me when I say they can handle themselves!” She laughs. Lup slows her stride a little to allow the much shorter and much rounder man to catch his breath.

A train whistle sounds behind them. “Lup?!” A stocky human with fluffy red hair peeking out from a hat covering their eyes shouts out the window.

“Hey Roswell! Could ya give us a lift!? Pirates are after us!” Lup shouts as the train comes close to them.

“Sure thing pardner, better hop on!”

Lup grabs Barry’s hand and they run to keep pace with the moving train. Barry grabs hold and hops on first followed by Lup. They climb into the open cart behind the kaboose.

 

The crowd parts around the car as Taako slides the car to a stop next to his crew mates.

“Alright chucklefucks, get your asses in a seat, we gotta catch that crystal!” Taako announces.

“But mom, he's held up in that house there.” Magnus says through a swollen lip.

“You knucklehead, they made an escape! Now get in or I'm leaving all your sorry butts here!” 

Carey and Killian waste no time hopping in, Merle is a little too slow and has to run and jump in as Taako slams on the gas, and Magnus grabs hold of the back of the car and is left to hold on for dear life.

“They don't seem to like you guys very much! Well here's a little something to remember us by!” Taako cackles as he throws a grenade in front of the crowd. They scatter like mice and the explosion causes little more harm than a scorched street and some crispy furniture remains for earlier improvised weapons.

“Very bumpy back here mom, veeeery bumpy!” Magnus shouts, attempting to climb into the actual car, which is very cramped at this point. Taako sits in the driver's seat with Kravitz standing directly behind him, Merle in passenger, and Carey and Killian in the back trying to help pull Magnus in as well.


	7. 7

The rumbling of a speeding automobile sounds from the road next to the tracks along with an array of shouting. 

“We got company!” Lup shouts, hopping from cart to kaboose to stoke the engine’s fire.

“Oh my well would you look at that, real life pirates!” Roswell gapes, looking at the car as it ramps from the road to the tracks.

The car bangs into the back cart as the two vehicles speed down the tracks.

“Uuuuh Guys!????” Barry calls, distressed.

Lup grabs a lump of coal and crushes it in her hands, throwing it back, with the heavy wind and a bit of luck, the dust hits the driver square in the eyes.

He shrieks and falls back, the handsome man behind him takes the wheel whilst simultaneously wrapping himself protectively around the coal-blinded elf.

“What are you waiting for!? Get em’!” Kravitz shouts for Taako, who is still coughing and attempting to clear the dust from his eyes.

Magnus and Carey begin to leap from cart to cart.

Lup vaults through the window between the kaboose and the first cart and stands on the connector between the two.

“Could ya get in there and help stoke the engine? I'm gonna disconnect the carts!” She shouts over the wind.

Barry nods and scrambles through the window, his foot gets caught and he falls flat on his face. Lup giggles as she yanks at the security latch. Barry jumps up holding the shovel close to his chest, cheeks a bright red.

Lup finally frees the cart and braces her back against the kaboose, kicking the carts away. Barry shovels coal into the engine’s fire and the train picks up speed, separating from the carts from them.

Kravitz conveys what's happening to Taako and he slams harder on the gas, thus speeding the carts back into the train, nearly crushing Lup.

Magnus and Carey reach the first cart and reach out to grab one of them. Barry reacts swiftly and slams the shovel square across their faces.

“That's one tough little nerd.” Magnus grumbles, followed by a sound of agreement from Carey as they both fall backwards.

“Get rekt!” Lup cackles, rapidly spinning the manual emergency brake on the cart. The carts all slam into each other and the car comes to a screeching halt and Lup springs off of it and halfway through the window, Barry helping to pull her in the rest of the way.

“Y'all are crazy, but that was pretty awesome!” Roswell laughs.

Lup and Barry share a look before erupting into boisterous laughter.

 

“You alright, love?” Kravitz asks softly, dabbing at Taako’s eyes with a damp handkerchief.

“Keep talking in that accent and I will be~” Taako chimes.

“Wot? You mean this one?” Kravitz replies playfully, thickening the terrible accent to levels of absolute ridiculousness. Taako snorts, trying to hold back laughter and Kravitz responds by showering him is soft little kisses, Taako giggles like a schoolgirl.

“Ugh, get a room you two.” Merle groans.

Taako glares him down without the ability to open his eyes.

“I think it's sweet~” Carey hugs Killian's waist as she and Magnus heft another cart off the tracks.

“Yeah but this is coming from the guy who regularly lectures us about pda.” Magnus laughs, moving to the next cart.

“Yeah well at least  _ we _ aren't trying to adopt kids at every corner!” Taako snaps, directed towards Magnus and the two lesbians.

“Yeah, but that's only because you've already adopted the entire crew  _ Mom _ .” Carey sasses.

“Yeah, that joke has gotten way out of hand…” Taako grumbles, “now hurry up and get those fuckin’ carts out of the way!” He orders.

 

“Yes mom.” They all respond in unison.

As Magnus and Killian topple the last cart off the cliff and Taako’s eyes are finally clear enough to open them, a loud train whistle shakes the air. Everyone falls silent.

“That's military.” Killian states with concern.

“Should we fall back?” Kravitz asks.

“No.” Taako leaps back into the car, “The military is currently allied with you-know-who. I think that given the choice between the two, the odds are in our favor.” 

“Can't argue with that. Let's go!” Magnus jumps in, soon followed by the others.


	8. 8

The small kaboose speeds along the tracks.

“Would wonders never cease, it's the army!” Roswell pulls the breaks, bringing them to a slow stop.

“Seriously!? The heck are they doing all the way out here!?” Lup gapes, leaning out the window. Barry hangs close to her side as he too peers out the window.

“Hey! Do y'all think ya could lend these young folks a hand? Pirates have been after em’ all day!” Roswell hollers, waving to the military train.

Barry and Lup disembark the train and move hand in hand towards the heavily armored steam engine.

Two men wearing all black with concealed faces step out, followed by a man in a suit with pale skin and slicked back black hair.

Barry's breath hitches and he freezes. Lup feels the tug on her hand and turns to face him.

“What's wrong?” She asks softly.

The men in black start walking swiftly towards them.

“Bad men…” Barry mutters just above a whisper. “I'm sorry Lup.” Barry lets go of her hand and sprints back the way they came.

“H-hey wait!” Lup shouts, moving to follow. One of the men grabs her arm and the other moves to pass them to get to Barry. Roswell pulls a lever that releases steam directly into their faces and they both reel back. Lup pulls away and runs after Barry.

The familiar sound of an automobile swerving down tracks sounds as the pirate's car skids to a stop in front of them.

And now seeing each other's faces clearly for the first time all day..

“TAAKO!?”

“LUP!?” 

The twins revel in their obliviousness until the men behind them grunt and Barry's grip tightens on Lup’s arm.

“Uhhh, reunite later, get the fuck away now!” Killian shouts, gesturing to the oncoming military threat.

The two nod and Lup grabs on to the side of the car, pulling Barry on with her. Barry is obviously nervous but he trusts Lup and would rather go with pirates than with John.

John shouts some sort of command and the military equipment whirls to life and fires at the car. 

The car swerves and just barely manages to stay on the tracks, but the blast hits the rails which start to collapse into the canyon bellow. Another shot is fired and Lup loses her grip on the car, yelling out a curse as Barry is pulled down with her. She grabs hold of the collapsing rails and Barry with the other, thanking her lucky stars that she chose to work in the mines so that she has the upper body strength to pull this off.

“Just let go! I've caused you enough trouble!” Barry shouts, trying to make Lup let go of his hand.

Her ironclad grip tightens around his wrist and she grits her teeth, “We've made it this far together, I'm not leaving here without you!” She shouts back, arm shaking as she tries with little success to pull them both up.

Taako catches sight of the two falling and attempts to turn the car back to get them but turns too quickly at the same time as a blast actually hits the car, sending everyone inside flying to safe ground.

Taako immediately scrambles to his feet and bolts back towards Lup, ignoring the spiking pain in his ankle. Magnus shoves the remains of the car off of him and Merle and lunges to grab Taako. He thrashes in Magnus's hug-grapple, screaming every common curse and then some. Kravitz helps Merle to his feet before moving to try to help calm the furious elf. Carey and Killian look on helplessly, not knowing what to do. 

Merle waddles to the cliff edge and everyone watches as the beam supporting Lup and Barry gives out, sending them both screaming and falling down into darkness.

Taako cries out in agony, nearly slipping out of Magnus's arms if not for Kravitz being there as well. 

“Wait..” Merle holds up a hand and stares determinedly into the inky blackness. Everyone falls quiet and soft gasps array over them as a small blue light lights up the darkness. Taako exhales a breath that no one thought he even had after all his screaming.

“That's-” Killian starts.

“Exactly what happened on the airship. I'll bet my good arm that they'll be just fine.” Merle turns to the others, Taako in particular, and gives a warm smile.

“That's good and all but we're still in trouble.” Killian points to the soldiers reloading the tank-train's heavy artillery.

“Yup, time to go!” Taako hops back onto his own feet only to go falling towards the ground. Magnus snaches him up again before he can hit the ground.

“That's not good.” Merle says, inspecting Taako’s swollen ankle.

“Time to go, time to go, time to go!” Killian grabs Merle, shoves him onto Magnus as well, grabs Magnus and Kravitz's arms and sprints towards Carey who is ten steps ahead of them and waving them into a narrow alleyway. 


	9. 9

Lup and Barry scream as they fall, still clinging to each other.

A bright blue glow sputters and gushes out from the crystal before holding at a solid glow and gravity seems to lessen as they begin to lightly float down as opposed to falling rapidly.

Barry stares at the darkness below them, looking more than a little light-headed.

“This is how I found you, ya know?”

Barry makes a bewildered sound of acknowledgement. He chuckles a little and looks up to meet Lup's eyes, “This is absolutely crazy.”

Lup laughs, “Ya’ got that right!”

They shift position so that they're holding each other's arms, faces only inches from each other's, grinning like idiots.

 

They're feet touch down in the ground of the mines and the light starts to dim.

“Uuhhh, would now be a bad time to mention I'm afraid of the dark?” Panic etches into his voice.

“Hold on, hold on.” Lup digs into her pocket with one hand, snatching a convenient lamp off the ground with the other.

Barry tenses and holds his breath as the light dims, submerging the pair in darkness. Seconds later, a small flick of red and the tunnel is illuminated by a soft yellow glow. He lets out a sigh, but his breathing remains shallow.

“You ok there beans?” Lup asks, taking up his hand again.

“Y-yeah, or at-at least I will be.” He stutters.

“Well don't you worry your pretty little head about a thing, I know these mines like the back of my hand!” Lup bluffs. She honestly has no idea where they are, but Barry  _ really  _ doesn't need to know that at the moment. So Lup picks a direction and pretends to know where they're going.

“Sooooo, why were you in some aircraft to fall out of in the first place?” Lup inquires.

“I-uh- well this is going to sound super fake but- I don't know?” Barry shrugs, looking guilty.

“You don't know!?” she gapes

“Well- not exactly? I think it was a little less than a year ago, I woke up in a field not knowing where I was or where I came from. So I just started wandering around, the only thing I had was this crystal and a feeling that I had to hold onto it no matter what. And then those men came, they tried to take it and when I wouldn't give it to them they took me with it.” he explains.

“They kidnapped you!?!” she looks ready to fight someone.

“Y- I mean I'm an adult- but th-the concept- yes.”

“And they're working with the military!?! The fuck is going on???” Lup throws her hands in the air in frustration, accidentally dragging Barry's with them. She realizes so and puts her hands back down and smiles apologetically, trying to ignore the flush in her cheeks.

“So- uh how do you know the pirates?” He asks awkwardly. 

“Hahaha, funny story- the idiot who's face I threw coal dust in- happens to be my brother.” She laughs awkwardly.

“Do I get to hear the story?” He chuckles.

“There's not much to tell; me an’ Koko were just two little orphans against the world, lived on the road for most of our lives. But around a year ago we found ourselves in this little mining town.  I wanted to stay but Taako wanted to keep moving, he had accumulated a little gang and ran off with them. Guess he became a pirate without me!” She shrugs, trying not to look sad.

 

They continue walking for a while when-

“ _ Gerblins!!! _ ” A voice squaks from further down the tunnels.

“Cassidy!? Is that you?!” Lup holds up the light to reveal a large, muscular woman dusted with dirt, wearing a tank top and jeans with a flannel tied around her waist and a bandana tied around her upper arm, and curly red hair pulled back in a messy bun.

“If my ears don't deceive me, that she-gerblin sounds like Lup!” Cassidy shouts.

“That's because it is me, Cassidy!” Lup shouts back, pulling Barry along with her up to Cassidy.

“Well who is that there with Ya’ gerblin-Lup?” she points to Barry.

“This is Barry Bluejeans-” she tries to hold back a giggle at saying his full name. “The government is after him!” 

Barry waves shyly.

“Well that sounds like some messy business, all illegals n’ stuff!” Cassidy mumbles.

“Exactly!” She beams.

“...Welp! Best be getting ya’ outta these here caves, if they know you're here then it won't take em long to find ya’!” Cassidy starts walking and Lup follows.

 

“This is the exit!” Cassidy gestures to a big hole streaming light into the tunnel.

“Thanks babe, see ya later if I don't die!” Lup waves, hopping out of the hole.

“Uh- it was nice meeting you- bye!” Barry fumbles, hopping out after her.

“Bye gerblins! Good luck fighting the government!” Cassidy waves before walking away.

Barry turns around to deny any fighting the government-

“HELL YEAH!” Lup shouts, flexing.

 

They walk a ways through some grassy fields, trying to put some distance between them and the army.

An airship suddenly depends from the sky near them, not just one but a whole fleet. They surround the duo before they have any chance to run.

Lup stands protectively in front of Barry.

Soldiers grab and pull the two of them apart.

Lup knocks out three and a half guys, Barry knocks out two, before enough men are there to restrain the both of them.

“Well, well, well, you're a slippery one  _ Sildar Hallwinter. _ ” John sneers, stepping into view.

“Whomst the fuck-” Lup exclaims, cut off by Barry's groan. 

“He refused to believe that Barry Bluejeans is my real name- so he made one up.” Barry cringes.

John rolls his eyes, “Regardless of your name…” John walks so he's now standing over Barry, “You're mine.” He states darkly before kicking him in the side of the head, hard.

Barry falls limp to the ground, unconscious.

“ _ BARRY _ !” Lup cries out, thrashing against the soldier’s grasp. 

One of them lands a lucky punch, sending her falling to the ground unconscious as well


	10. 10

Lup's eyes flutter open slowly and she jolts up with a start on the icy stone. After a quick sweep of the room she recognizes that she's in a prison cell, alone.

She reaches up a hand to her temple and winces when her fingers make contact with the purple bruise just above her eye.

She pushes to her feet and stumbles for a second due to the rush of blood to her head. She shakes it off and runs to the door, trying to bust it open. When it doesn't budge she catches sight of the small, high up, window and grins at the challenge.

She presses up against the door before pushing off of it and sprinting towards the opposing wall, using her momentum to run up the wall a ways, clawing her way up further, and finally gripping the window ledge. She pulls herself up before having the horrible realization that the window is  _ just _ a  _ little _ to small for her to fit through. She begrudgingly slides back down the wall and glares at the door, at least trying to be intimidating to whomever next opens it. 

That person, of course, ended up being three of the biggest, buffest, soldiers they had.

 

Barry stares intently out the shattered window, clutching his bleeding palms. He's locked in some sort of luxury room with an iron door and a large window with a tight grid of rigid framing. He already destroyed two innocent chairs against the locked door and one against the window - hence the cuts and blood decorating his hands.

he does not appreciate the stupidly dramatic white robe they changed him into. It is far too stiff to be comfortable, too thin to be even remotely warm, and  _ just _ long enough to be hazardous.

He feels angry, not just because of being stuck here, but knowing that Lup is more than likely stuck here as well, and John has the crystal so just let that be the cherry on top of shitty things about the situation.

And of course the next person to walk into the room is John, flanked by his men in black. Barry scowles. 

“Now now, I'm not here to fight you, I'm here to offer you a deal.” John extends his hand for Barry to take.

Barry steels his expression and stares defiantly into John's eyes, hands remaining at his sides.

John looks a little sadly at his hand before pulling it back and putting it down. “Well maybe you’d appreciate an explanation for everything that's been going on first..” he leads, motioning for the two men to grab him.

The shadow men, with surprising strength, grab Barry's arms, restating him and pulling him along after John. They walk briskly through the halls that Barry makes a point of committing to memory, just in case.

They make their way to what appears to be a scientific laboratory with lots of air locks and sealed iron doors. A man with unkempt brown hair, patchy stubble, and large glasses wearing a white lab coat stands over what looks like the beginnings of a robot arts-and-crafts project.

“Lucas.” John calls for the man's attention.

“Wh- AH-  _ OW- _ oh- John!” Lucas stutters, gripping his foot with one hand and the wrench he just dropped on said foot with the other.

“The robot?” John suggests, gesturing to a large, sealed, iron door underneath them.

“O-oh yes! Of course!” He slams down a couple buttons and the door spirals open and fluorescent lights light up a long winding staircase.

John trotts down the stairs with no trouble, followed by the men carrying Barry.

At the bottom of the stairs lies a large crystal golem, or at least that's how it looks from the outside, upon closer inspection it has a robotic interior.

“I assume I needn't tell you what a robot is, but this robot is powered by something unique, some  _ incredible _ power beyond our comprehension. The lingering energy signatures match perfectly with that of your crystal…” John slowly circles the robot and Barry as he talks. “Have you heard of Laputa? The floating city.”

“A floating city? That's fantasy, are you delusional?..” Barry takes a sweep of the room, “I take that question back; you  _ are _ delusional.”

“Oh but I'm really not, it  _ is _ possible and it  _ does  _ exist, we just need to be shown the way…” John reaches into his breast pocket as he walks behind Barry. “We just need someone to light the way.” He wraps the crystal on it's leather string around Barry's neck, “You do know how to activate it don't you?” He whispers.

“Go to hell.” Barry growls, he then kicks back directly into John's groin, hard. 

He doesn't even flinch, “Well that's unfortunate, but I suppose I should still offer you the ability to say goodbye to your friend. And before you freak out; if you agree to make her go home then that goodbye will probably only be temporary, refuse and it  _ will _ be  _ permanent. _ ”

 

Barry and Lup are both dragged to a grassy field just outside the base. Lup is loudly cursing and thrashing in their grasp. Barry is silently being dragged. They are both roughly dropped on the ground. Barry gets to his feet and is immediately assaulted by Lup, who hugs him before going protective mode and asking if he's ok, what happened to his hands, what they did to him, etc. He smiles to himself, she  _ cares _ so much even though they barely know each other. That smile quickly goes grim.

“You have to leave.” Barry says pointedly with determination, cutting Lup off.

“Wh-what do you mean? I'm not going anywhere without you.” Lup grips onto his arms and moves her head to try and make eye contact with him.

“Well you see, we've had a terrible misunderstanding. We feel just awful about dragging you into this whole mess.” John says with an edge of malice.

Lup glares at him. She knows it's bullshit but when Barry pulls away from her to stand by John, she's at a complete loss for what to do.

The soldiers and men in black walk back to the base, Barry following obediently, and John flicks her a gold coin as a sort of 'for your troubles’ gesture. She's frozen in place until they're out of sight. And then?

She looks down at the coin in her hand and clenches it in her fist with bubbling anger. She needs backup. And she knows where to find it.

Lup runs, sprinting with all her strength and speed, back to where this day began, back home. Where her pirate of a brother is undoubtedly waiting.


	11. 11

She starts sprinting illuminated by the sunset but by the time she makes it home, the stars hang heavy in the night sky and she's ready to collapse from her lack of breath. She shoves down her fatigue and slams open the doors. 

Inside, Taako halts his pacing, Magnus, Merle, Carey, and Killian look up from their card game, and Kravitz freezes from where he'd been trying to coax some comfort into Taako.

Before anyone can get a word in, Taako hugs Lup.

“You scared me dingus!” He screams, muffled by her shoulder.

“Didn't know you were worried goofus.” She laughs breathlessly, raising up a hand pat his head.

“You have some explaining to do!” Taako punches her shoulder playfully.

“And you don't? … We can go over all the gushy stuff later but right now I need a rescue team.” Lup's expression goes serious.

“For who? The chubby nerd? I don't-” Merle starts.

“We leave in five minutes!” Taako interrupts.

“Yup, let's go save a nerd!” Magnus shouts, hopping up and re-equipping his gear.

“Can't argue with that!” Carey chuckles with a shrug, tossing Killian her gear before grabbing her own.

  
  


“I'll leave you here until you remember how to activate the crystal.” John shuts the iron door to the trashed room he was in earlier.

“Ok what now…” Barry mutters to himself, and he sits to once again look out the window.

The stars of the night sky shimmer wildly and something swells in his chest. Something familiar and warm, but just out of his reach. He leans into that familiar feeling and recalls that he felt it earlier. With Lup, with the pirates, even an uneasy familiarity with John and his men. He feels bonds with these people and can almost visualize strings of light connecting them.

He spends a good while trying to clear the static from his head, but one word stands out…

“Family…” Barry mutters. And as if that was the final key- the crystal begins to gush with light.

Screaming echoes the halls from the Lab and John bursts in the door.

“You did it! You summoned the light!” John tries to move in to take a better look at the stone and Barry makes a move, he shoves John as hard as he can into the piled up chair remains and makes a break for the doors.

Barry moves in a daze, everything happening at once and too much to process, so he just focuses on escaping the fortress.

He dodges the men in frantic chaos and tries to ignore the crystal robot come to life. He runs and runs and-shit. 

Barry stops to take in the fact that he did, indeed, just run right to the roof.

The wind pulls at him and he turns to run back but is confronted by the robot.

He stares and it stares back. He backs up and it follows. He holds up his hand and the robot holds it's up as well.

They stand silent atop the spire, palm to palm. The light engulfing the crystal concentrates into a solid beam, pointing to the clouds.

A sudden explosion echoes through the air seconds before an artillery shell explodes with a bang into the robot's chest. Barry narrowly misses being hit, saved by his short stature.

The robot glows with charging energy before firing a beam of pure destruction across the building, toppling several other spires.

“Ok-ok- uuuuh le-let’s maybe not do the- the killing thing please?” Barry stutters, pushing his hands against the robot's chest to try and get it to stop.

Another shell.

Another beam.

The landscape is illuminated by flame. The wind picks up and embers fly with it. Barry continues his plea to get the robot to stop, he wants to leave, not murder everyone in the process.

It turns down towards him and picks him up with a single hand. Of course now he begins to panic a  _ lot _ more.

He thrashes against it's grasp only to be placed gently on the wall. They stare at each other again for a moment before another military shell hits the robot. This shot finally causes it to collapse.

The remains of the robot glow as if about to explode and, surrounded by flames, Barry has nowhere left to go.

“BARRY!” A familiar voice rings through the air. He has just enough time to turn and see Lup, hanging off a small flying vehicle, upside down with her arms outstretched, before they slam full force into each other. Lup locks her hands behind his back and they are flown away from the platform as it explodes.

Barry had failed to notice the string around his neck coming undone and with the force of the blast, the crystal falls and plummets into the rubble. They both try to grab it but it's just too small and slips through their fingers.

 

After several more fliers meet them, a strong pair of arms pulls the two of them back onto the full platform.

“Ok so now that the danger is less; WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED!?” Taako exclaims.

Barry and Lup are crowded in the back of the small flier driven by Taako. Next to them Merle pulls his and Magnus's flier a safer distance from where Magnus pulled them up. Kravitz is squished awkwardly between Magnus and Merle. Carey and Killian share one a ways back, they seem to be chatting with each other with little concern for the others.

“Uuuuh- some stuff about a flying city, a berzerk robot, aaannd some crazy military dudes?” Barry tries.

“Uh- hi- yeah- I have more questions now?” Magnus adds. “Why’d you tell Lup to leave?”

“Yeah, didn't seem like ya like em very much.” Merle adds.

Lup punches him softly on the shoulder so he can't keep avoiding eye contact.

“I don't see why this is becoming an interrogation, from shady military dudes to a hostage, I figured blackmail was obvious.” Barry shrugs, chuckling softly.

“Ohhhhhh, ok yeah that makes sense.” Magnus nods.

“Yeah but I was 'what the fuck’ing the gIANT ASS FLAMING ROBOT!?!!!” Taako shouts.

“Apparently these guys think that there's some sort of flying city up there that has an abundant power source and that's where the robot is from. I-... I think that  _ I  _ activated the robot?” Barry explains.

From the mention of the flying city Taako’s expression went from laid back frustration to all-out dread.

“Yeah well we're gonna get there first then! If I know the fucker behind this- and I believe I do- then there's some serious treasure there!” Like flipping a switch, Taako sounds happily large and in charge again. “Now don't think you don't have to work on this crew while we're helping ya! Barry, you look like a nerd so I'll hand you over to Davenport and Lucretia, they'll have  _ definitely _ have something that needs doing. Lup, you'll be working in the kitchen, I'm too busy to do it myself so that's your job now.”

Magnus whoops and Merle cheers as well, looping their craft.

“Did I just hear that Taako’s sister is cooking instead of Merle!?” Carey screams, looping their craft around Taako’s.

“Hey! Mine isn't  _ that _ bad!” Merle shouts.

“Hey Lup! Can you make pudding!?” Magnus shouts.

“Who do you think I am!?” Lup shouts back.

“How about snickerdoodles!?” Carey adds.

“And those- uh ones with like the jelly in the middle, I don't know what they're called but they're good!” Merle adds as well.

“How about chocolate lava cakes!?” Kravitz and Killian shout in unison.

The whole crew is cheering and circling each other in sloppy loops, they even activate colored smoke machines.

“HEY! Calm down you chucklefucks!” Taako orders. “What can I say, they just… love dessert.” He mumbles with a shrug.

Lup is filling the air with boisterous laughter and Barry joins in a bit more shyly with a bit of blush on his cheeks.


	12. 12

“Alright, Lup come with me; we're gonna get you changed, give ya a quick tour, and then it's your job to deal with that mess of a kitchen.” Taako swiftly links their arms and Lup grins with him. He points to Magnus, “Maggy, you get Barold a change of clothes, give him a tour, and bring him to Cap’nport to get him a job.”

“Yes mom!” Magnus chimes. Taako flips him off and he does heart hands back before grabbing Barry's arm and bounding towards his room. Barry waves a short wave before running with Magnus with a big goofy grin on his face.

“Back to chores with us I guess.” Killian says and drags a whining Carey and Merle with her.

“Have fun, love.” Kravitz gives Taako a kiss on the cheek before striding to catch up to the chore trio.

“Oooh~ We have a  _ lot _ to talk about~” Lup chimes and Taako’s expression falls again.

“Yeah, we do. Let's go to my room first though.” He struggles to smile.

 

“So what's wrong? You disappeared on me and I can tell by your face that your hiding something.” She says seriously once he closes the door.

“I- well. You remember Sazed don't you?” He begins. Lup nods. “Well he convinced me to 'run away with him’ some sort of shitty romantic gesture or some shit like that. I'm still not a hundred percent sure  _ how _ he managed to get me to go along with it but he did. And he-uh h-he … he did- did some…  _ stuff _ that I was  _ not _ ok with a-and in the end I-I was left lost alone.” he curls in on himself on the bed a little.

“Koko…” Lup sits on the mattress next to him and hugs him close.

“Anyway, he talked some crazy shit about a flying city so I’m guessing he’s more or less behind all the shit with your boy Barold. Speaking of what’s going on there.” he switches topics and flips the mood.

“Oh don’t think you can get away with not telling me about  _ your _ boyfriend.” she prompts, gesturing to the orderly nightstand of clearly-not-Taako things.

“Well if we’re talking boy gossip then you can at least put on some decent clothing.” he rolls back and lands on the floor and walks over to a dresser on that side of the room and starts shuffling through for some clothing of various styles.

“Ok well I asked first sooooo; how’d ya meet?” Lup lays on her stomach, chin resting on her palm.

“Would you believe me if I said Craigslist?”

“No.” she deadpans.

“Would you believe it if I said it was a drunk dare  _ involving _ Craigslist?” he pulls out a pair of high waisted skinny jeans and a crop top.

“no…” she gasps with a soft chuckle.

He throws the clothes at her head.

“What was he on Craigslist for!?!?” She pulls the garments from her face and sits upright.

“He needed a fake date for some kinda heist. I signed up while drunk but met him sober as a saint.”

“And do all crew members share rooms or just you two?” Lup teases, undressing from her dirtied and torn clothes.

“Yeah right, I'm not the captain. Davenport just allows the couples to room together so we would stop sneaking around at night.”

“Couples, plural, as in multiple??” she struggles with the pants a little, “and wow, how thin are you?”

“Yes a majority of this crew are in relationships, mind your own business. And sorry I can't crush a man's skull between my thighs.”

They stare at each other for a moment before collapsing into laughter.

 

Magnus reaches to open the door and is immediately met with said door to his face.

“Oh- sorry honey.” A woman of medium height but muscular build with curly dark brown hair tied in a ponytail wearing a bandana that matches Magnus's appears and pulls back the door from where it just hit Magnus in the face.

“S’ok Jules.” Despite his now bloody nose, he smiles down at her. He bends down to her height and pulls a pout, “Kiss it better?”

She laughs and takes his face in her hands, softly kissing his nose. “Better?”

“Better.” They smile at each other for a moment like the rest of the world isn't even there.

It's cute and all but Barry feels a little awkward being the third wheel here so he subtly clears his throat to bring them back to the present.

“Oh- yeah! Julia this is Barry, Barry this is my wife Julia.” 

Barry extends his hand and she returns the hand shake.

“It's a pleasure to meet you. I'm assuming I'll have to be briefed later on why we're not still chasing this guy down?”

“Yeah, I'll tell you all about it later.” Magnus kisses Julia and the two part, Julia going the direction they came from and Magnus turning into the room.

Barry waves and turns into the room to immediately see Magnus crouched down and sifting through a dresser drawer.

“These are probably going to be big on you but I guarantee they'll be better than what your wearing.” Magnus tosses him a pair of baggy blue jeans with a sturdy leather belt and a light grey turtleneck sweater.

Barry takes one look down at the stupidly long white robe now covered in ash and blood, “Yeah, your right about that.” He laughs. “Uh- where can I- where can I change?” He asks awkwardly.

“Oh, you can change in here or you can change in that bathroom there.” Magnus points to a door on the far side of the room. “Sorry, we change in front of each other so often that I forgot that it's not normal to do so.” He scratches the back of his neck as he laughs. It feels so warm and familiar to Barry that he can't help but smile.

“W-well if I'm going to join this crew th-then I'd better get used to shouldn't I.” He laughs, taking off the offensive garment and throwing it on the ground.

Magnus cheers “One of us! One of us!”

 

They walk across the exterior deck towards the helm. The clothes are definitely big on Barry, the jeans are rolled up at least three times and still easily reach his ankles and the belt is cinched all the way to it's last hole, the combat boots he borrowed are closer but still need to be laced very tightly and the excess lace tucked into the boots, the sweater sleeves are bunched up and need to be because they're easily twice as long as his arms. He’d look a little like a toddler in daddy's clothes if not for his scruffy stubble.

He'd already been given the tour;

Carey, Killian, and a woman in full armor named Noelle greeted him in the training room with an array of flamboyantly badass flips.

Kravitz and a depressed-sounding man wearing a feathered cap named Johann played a song for them in the 'party room’ as was sloppily labeled on the door.

Merle and a Tall drow with a spider on his tunic and long white hair named Brian greeted them on the deck in the middle of cleaning. Brian practically begged to let him take Barry's measurements to start on some properly tailored clothes for him but Merle kept him there because it was their day to clean shit.

Julia and a gruff looking dwarf of few words with a cigar in his mouth named Boyland, greeted them briefly from the engine room, busy with a particularly troublesome piece of machinery.

Barry got re-introduced to a man with curly hair tied back into a ponytail with goggles on his head named Avi. They had met briefly before when landing the small aircrafts in the hanger. He was elbow deep in oil and metal with a big dopey grin on his face, talking about how many sweet tricks they'll be able to do in them once he's done with these upgrades.

Magnus briefly shows him the Fantasy Costco, a small shop that looks a little out of place. He's introduced to Garfield the deals warlock, an orange tabby cat with the devil's grin.

They pass the empty laundry room where Brian normally works when it isn't his day to do chores.

Magnus was about to open the door to the kitchen when they heard Lup and Taako yelling at each other on account of the chaos state of said kitchen, Magnus steered the tour away from that as quickly as possible.

Now they head to the helm to meet the remaining crew members and find him a job.

They step into a large circular  room with several tables covered in papers and a helm full of controls at the front, highlighted by sunlight beaming in from a wall of sturdy windows. At one of the tables sits a woman with tanned skin and white hair scribbling furiously in two journals at once. At another sits a young boy with round glasses, big eyes, and a feathered cap, bouncing between reading several different books and taking notes in between. And at the helm tweaking their course stands a gnome man with slicked back orange hair and a perky mustache who somehow manages to appear both friendly and intimidating.

“Hey, Cap'nport!” Magnus chimes as the door clicks shut.

“Hello Magnus,” Davenport turns from the helm to give the duo a once-over. He walks up and stretches out his hand. “My name is Davenport  but as I'm sure you've seen already, this crew is a fan  of nicknames.”

Barry returns the handshake. “Barry Bluejeans, and I have a feeling they won't be needing a nickname for me.” He laughs.

“You’d be surprised.” Davenport chuckles. “Well I guess we're supposed to find a job for you. Lucretia, Angus, any ideas?” He asks the other two in the room.

Angus looks up from his books and notes, “Well Sir, what are you already good at?” He asks.

Lucretia sets down her pens, “Yes, it might be better to utilize his skills rather than teach him new ones.” She agrees.

Everyone turns to Barry.

“W-well I uh- have some experience as an adventurer so I know basic combat, I know a good deal about geography and geology, I know a good deal of languages as well, I'm good at math and a number of sciences-”

“Neeeerd!” Taako cuts Barry off mid-list, striding into the room. “Either take him here or give him to Magic Brian, ya’ll  _ know _ he's been asking for an assistant.”

Davenport shakes out of his stunned expression, “Well why not both? He can help us map courses here and he can be Brian's apprentice.” Davenport suggests.

“Yeah! We're gonna go after Laputa anyways right? And that's where that cool light beam was pointing right? So Barry can map where we need to go!” Magnus cheers.

“That's a great idea Sir!” Angus chimes. Lucretia nods with a gentle smile before pulling out a third journal to take note.

“Fine, he's your problem now.” Taako shrugs. 

“Barry Bluejeans,” Davenport begins, cut off momentarily by snickers from the other crew members, “Welcome to the Starblaster.”.


	13. Sorry Yall

Yeah sorry to anyone looking forward to reading this to the end, just watch the movie because I really just followed it almost exactly. I've kinda lost any and all motivation to write out the end (despite how close I am), not because I'm out of the fandom but more so because I feel kind of bad about how unoriginal I was with this fic and how I sometimes prioritized writing for this over my better ideas for the sake of simplicity.

I'm sorry to disappoint, I'm not going to delete it (because I get sad when other writers do so) but there will be no written end.

I will tell you however, the one twist I had at the end.... it's just as bland and unoriginal as the rest of this- Everyone dies! But then Barry wakes up and it turns out it was all a dream! ~.o.~

Now go read some better taz fics! ((I highly recommend  _the worst candlenights ever_   by Weevilo707 and  _bury the lead_  by marywhale both of which are also on ao3))

Thank you all <3<3<3 


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